The Olympics -- La-Dee-Freakin'-Da

February 23, 2002

Well, the worst display of fanatical flag-waving in recent memory is coming to a close. Maybe now everybody can get back to normal and remember that they don't really give a damn about figure skating, cross-country skiing or the biathalon.

Never mind that we raised such a huge stink when one of our guys was accidentally tripped in a speed-skating race that the officials wound up taking away someone else's gold medal. Or that when the Russians beat the Fifty-First State (Canada) in figure skating that we bitched about it non-stop until the IOC changed the rules. Now, was there something going on there? Probably. But would we have really cared if it had been the Chinese?

But anyway, the TV schedules are going to get back to normal, and a bunch of half-frozen idiots can stop chanting "USA! USA!" even when the US isn't playing.

And maybe we'll stop sticking the rest of the world's face in the fact that we're better at just about everything we want to be. Or maybe we'll stop insisting that everyone feel our pain for what happened last September. The rest of the world's been dealing with terrorism for decades -- the only difference between us and them was how long it took for us to notice, and the degree of the loss.

In other words, maybe the world will forget by the time the next Olympics start that we can be a bunch of loudmouthed assholes.

February 22, 2002February 25, 2002